Cynthia Nixon is working on her Tight Five.
At Tuesday night’s New York Legislative Correspondents Association Dinner (which is like the White House Correspondents Dinner but less rich), Nixon roasted everyone from Andrew Cuomo to squares.
“Vote for the homo, not for the Cuomo,” said the budding stand-up, in what was a shocking burn for anyone who was following the New York City mayoral race in 1977. You see, Cuomo’s own father, Mario, allegedly distributed homophobic flyers that year to undermine his closeted gay rival, Ed Koch. Koch, of course, eventually won. And honestly, the best punchline to this joke would be if Nixon were to win, too.
Nixon has encountered her own fair share of homophobia along her road to the governor’s seat. When she announced her campaign early in 2018, she was dubbed an “unqualified lesbian” by failed mayoral candidate (and successful lesbian) Christine Quinn. However, Nixon took the high road and printed a series of campaign buttons and t-shirts with the phrase on them.
Speaking of the high road, that was another thing that Nixon joked about in her standup show. In reference to both her platform on marijuana and Michelle Obama’s famous line about Donald Trump in 2016, Nixon deadpanned, “When they go low, we get high.”
She also took a swipe at her opponent’s frankly embarrassing weaknesses as a human being, saying, “I hear that Andrew Cuomo has not attended this event very often as governor … It must be either that he dislikes the press, or that he can’t laugh at himself, or just that he won’t come to any event that’s less than $25,000 a plate.”
All in all, we hope that Nixon was able to hone her comedy chops so that she can publish a comedic memoir about her experiences titled Miranda Writes.
(Editor’s Note: “Tight Five” refers to a stand-up comedian’s best material condensed into a five-minute routine. The More You Know.)