We’re down to the final four, y’all — and we can all probably predict who the winner will be.
If it were up to Ru, of course, Bebe would win by a landslide — but unfortunately, Bebe’s only guaranteed to stay as long as the Final Four, per her contract. (ALLEGEDLY.) Now, it’s up to viewers to decide the rest. And since Bebe has acted fairly Camerude this week, we can probably bet her out. And as for Shangela: Well, her fatsuit lip sync was way more hilarious than it should have been, and the pasties reveal was something Ben did a few weeks ago, but she also spent this entire season unfairly talking shit about everyone behind their backs. (She does know those confessionals get aired, right? Or did she think she was just kiki-ing with the producers?)
Thus, it’s probably down to Kennedy and Trixie — and Trixie is arguably one of the most likeable and famous working drag queens of the 21st century. So obviously, the winner will be … Morgan McMichaels!
J/k. In addition to not staying longer than an episode, Morgana also decided to be boring AF this week. We were super glad she was back, but then she played it cool and gave us a performance in Dragsmaids that came straight from the Kim Kardashian School of Not Acting. Her quacking was basically a re-enactment of the day Natalie Portman showed up to the Black Swan set on shrooms. (Her costar Mila Kunis had laced her coffee that morning in a fit of Method acting.)
Perhaps Morgan would have lasted another episode if she had just played herself in Dragsmaids — kind of like what Shangela did this week. Yup, we said it. Shangela played the same character she has always played for seven years (i.e. “herself”), and then criticized Bebe for doing the same exact thing. We are now convinced that her shit-talking is just her way of deflecting criticisms about her own weaknesses. You see, if Miss Shangy can spot her own weaknesses in other people first, then no one else will notice she ain’t perfect, either! (Except for us here at Flagrant, of course. We noticed. We were the true Cerseis of All Stars Season 3 all along, bitch!)
Kennedy was also a weak link in Dragsmaids, as much as we love her. (Emma Stone? More like Emma Stoned, amirite? … Sorry.) But seriously, wtf was that. Trixie was perfection, tho, and we honestly could watch her play a slutty confrontational bitch a thousand more times and still not be satisfied.
That being said, Shangela’s “Walking Pile of Decapitated Coneheads” look on the runway was pretty cool, as was Morgana’s Bravefart look. And as a bonus, Shangela’s look was reminiscent of Vivacious’ Season 6 “cone dress” look, which worked doubly well since Bebe looked like Vivacious’ symbiotic alien twin Ornacia. (P.S. How bonkers is it that Bebe did not understand that reference?? Even we did, and we have pothead memories.)
Also, guest judge Chris Colfer got in a pretty good dig about Kennedy acting like Jodie Foster in Nell, and Garcelle Beauvais was there, which means we got to Google who Garcelle Beauvais is. (She’s from NYPD Blue.)
Oh, and we’re forgetting the ringer: Democratic Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi, who knows how to get things done! Her presence, combined with the judges’ bit about calling representatives in Congress, was hopefully a kick in the butt for any Drag Race fans who made up the 50% of the country who didn’t vote in the 2016 election. (It still shocks us.)
So … As y’all continue to vote for the newest Drag Race All Star on sosh meeds …
Here are the week’s best lines:
Trixie: “Morgan needed to walk on water yesterday. Instead, she drowned.”
Trixie: “Bebe’s never seen Drag Race, and Kennedy doesn’t know what a meme is. Winning the crown is the only way out.”
Bebe, through no fault of her own: “I wonder why I’m being given ‘The Queen.’ She’s very uppity tight, very stiff, and kind of, very, unapproachable. I don’t get it.”
Bebe: “I feel sometimes when you try to copy accents, it can be taken as being rude.”