savageburn

Savage Burn: Advice Columnist Tells Gay Republican To F#&% Himself

Featured, Politics  

When Dan Savage received a letter recently from a gay Trump voter asking why no one wanted to sleep with him anymore, Savage knew that he could either shake his head and ignore it, or deliver an epic burn that would trounce all burns ever delivered in the history of burns. Cracking his knuckles and settling in for a ride, he chose the latter.

Wrote Savage in yesterday’s Savage Love Letter of the Day: “The question you should be asking yourself isn’t, ‘Why won’t some gay men sleep with me?’ but rather, ‘How on earth do I sleep at night?’”

In response to the author complaining about feeling discriminated against by Grindr users who have “no Trump supporters” on their profile, Savage responded, “You aren’t being discriminated against on Grindr, Scruff, Recon, et al, for who you are … but for what you’ve done.”

He then linked to like fifty headlines that enumerated all the terrible attacks President Trump has made on the LGBTQ community.

Most impressively, Savage used an actual legitimate legal argument to prove that having sex with someone who doesn’t know you’re a Trump supporter is legal evidence that you’re an asshole. It had something to do with a legal clause called “fraud in the factum” or something, and we were here for it.

Truly, dear readers: Savage’s letter — which you can read here in full — is a crimson and searing third-degree burn replete with receipts and no Aloe vera in sight. Savage even calls the author “honey, baby, darling” at one point, like Savage is Trixie Mattel.

The best part is that the author’s anonymous name is “Sorta Wondering If This Commonly Happens,” which means that Savage gets to address him as “SWITCH” over and over again, as if he were a fuckboy who can’t decide between top and bottom — or, in this case, right and wrong.

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