After reading about all the completely tone-deaf things that Dolce & Gabbana have done recently, such as opposing in vitro fertilization and adoption for same-sex parents, mammy earrings, shoes that pretty much endorse eating disorders, and naming these absolutely fabulous sandals “slave sandals,” one can imagine that their day begins with them sliding out of their gold-embroidered silk sheets in their respective Milanese palaces, placing their feet inside ostrich-feather slippers so that the marble floors won’t feel too cold, gazing into the enormous 18th century century mirrors above their vanities, and uttering to themselves, “I hate you.”
Domenico, Stefano, you’re rich. You’re famous. You’re …decent looking. Why don’t you leave the self-hate to us queers that never got cha cha heels for Christmas and just hate Trump like everyone else with a conscience does? We know, Melania is probably a victim too, but you cannot endorse evil. You cannot dress Melania and expect people to like you. Keeping her and her son in New York cost us American taxpayers a minimum of $127,000 a day. Multiply that by five months and it’s almost twenty million dollars. Imagine all the Dolce & Gabbana Jazz Club Boxer Briefs we could have gotten for that money.
Being mean takes too much effort. Learn to love yourself, Domenico and Stefano, so that you can love others too. Or at least stay away from Instagram.