Which Tom Hardy is your favorite? Murdery Tom Hardy from The Revenant, Murdery Tom Hardy from The Dark Knight Rises, or Murdery Tom Hardy from Legend? Or wait … There’s a new Tom Hardy! What about Dope ‘90s Rapper Tom Hardy, a.k.a. Tommy No. 1!
Some hero on Reddit recently uncovered a mixtape from back when Hardy, a.k.a. “Tommy No. 1,” was on his way to being the British Eminem, and it’s actually not too shabby. While we definitely think Hardy is better suited to acting, we’re also kind of digging the full-lipped hunk as a kind of verse-spitting, street-savvy sex god that could be straight out of a Guy Ritchie movie.
Hardy’s mixtape, Falling on Your Arse in 1999, which includes writing from Hardy, blesses us with the bonafide gift of Hardy rapping over the Godfather soundtrack and predicting his own future in Hollywood. (“I wanna be on the TV, so people can see me,” raps Hardy on the unfortunately titled “People Like to Boogie.”)
According to the mixtape’s listing, Hardy made the tape with his buddy Ed Tracy “in a bedroom in 1999.” Ooooh, a bedroom! Could this “creative process” have included those same-sex relations that Hardy admitted to back in 2008? After all, he would have been 22 at the time, which is close enough to being “a boy” — and Hardy did say he had gay sex “as a boy!” Please excuse us for a minute while we go re-listen to every track from this album and search desperately for queer subtext.
OK, we’re back. And honestly, the entire mixtape could be read for queer subtext — just like literally everything Hardy says and does. Perhaps, instead, we should look toward a previous interview in which Hardy referenced his past life as Tommy No. 1?
“Because I come from a nice middle-class neighbourhood it was a very hard sell,” he told the BBC in 2011. “And I wasn’t very good! I used to be with the guy who managed Leela James and Lauren Hill, Pras, the Fugees and all that. I worked out with (Grammy winning producers) Warren Riker and Gordon Williams.”
OK, nope, that was just a long humblebrag. (Notice how he said he “wasn’t very good” just before listing all the cool people he used to hang out with.)
Guess the quest for uncovering Hardy’s past as a gay sex magnet shall continue!