Epic Read: Explosive Book Details ‘Chaos And Dysfunction’ Of Trump’s White House

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Proving that it takes a charlatan to know a charlatan, a public war of words has erupted between President Just for Men Hair Coloring and his former White House strategist, the ever-bloated Steve Bannon. In excerpts of the upcoming book Fire and Fury: Inside the Trump White House by Michael Wolff (January 9 release, pre-orders have it topping the Amazon Best Sellers list), Bannon described the notorious June 2016 Trump Tower meeting with Trump campaigners and Russian lawyers bartering with dirt on Hillary Clinton as “treasonous.” These revelations prompted the biggest Bellyacher in Chief to issue a statement declaring Bannon has “lost his mind.”

Just this morning, Trump’s lawyers issued a cease and desist to prevent the book’s release early next week. The lawyers are also pursuing libel charges against the author.

Bannon’s candidate cretin Roy Moore “lost” the recent election for Alabama’s Senate seat, thank goodness. However, one has to wonder why proud asshole Bannon would care about anything unethical or “treasonous” if the end justifies the means. Probably, like Trumper, he is a vindictive pile of garbage who is miffed Jarvanka played a part in having him ousted, therefore volunteered himself to be a juicy source for Wolff’s explosive book.

Since merely the excerpts broke the Internet Wednesday morning, Fire and Fury might be worth the cover price. It’s no surprise Bannon dished some feces-laced dirt, but some of the more hilarious and/or scary morsels stem from unnamed “close” associates of The Apprentice star.

“‘Here’s the deal,’ a close Trump associate told Priebus. ‘In an hour meeting with him, you’re going to hear 54 minutes of stories, and they’re going to be the same stories over and over again. So you have to have one point to make, and you pepper it in whenever you can.’”

Grampa Simpson sounds more lucid.

Wolff reiterates the rumored scheme that Trump and the campaign officials didn’t expect to win the 2016 election, didn’t want to “win.” The idea was to win by losing, that Trump would start his own television network, and the whole bamboozle would land sycophants like Kellyanne Conway full-time jobs as TV pundits. When he won, it was a shock.

“Don Jr. told a friend that his father, or DJT, as he calls him, looked as if he had seen a ghost. Melania was in tears—and not of joy.”

On that election night, Bannon recalled “a befuddled Trump morphing into a disbelieving Trump and then into a horrified Trump. But still to come was the final transformation: Suddenly, Donald Trump became a man who believed that he deserved to be, and was wholly capable of being, the president of the United States.”

The ensuing rushed semblance of an administration produced basically the same circus we citizens are nauseated by today. As Wolff writes:

Nothing contributed to the chaos and dysfunction of the White House as much as Trump’s own behavior.”

All those White House leaks? It came from no-filter Trump blabbing to “friends” on the phone all day or at night in his room surrounded by three TV screens and McDonalds, letting loose a “river of grievances” that were immediately channeled to the media.

Trump’s need/hate relationship with the media is exemplified in the Fire and Fury excerpt’s accompanying sidebar, “How He Got the Story.” For 18 months, Michael Wolff just showed up in the White House, “because no one was in a position to either officially approve or formally deny such access.” Wolff described his presence as “a semi-permanent seat on a coach in the West Wing.” AND THE ARRANGEMENT WAS ENCOURAGED BY TRUMP.

Basket-case closed.

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