Hollywood has been warned: Madonna is directing her third movie.
The Material Lady is in talks to direct a ballet biopic called Taking Flight, which is coincidentally what her directing career has never done.
The biopic, which is adapted from a memoir of the same name by Sierra Leonean ballet star Michaela DePrince, will tell the story of DePrince’s journey from orphan in war-torn Sierra Leone to co-star of Beyonce’s visual album Lemonade.
“We have a unique opportunity to shed light on Sierra Leone and let Michaela be the voice for all the orphaned children she grew up beside,” explained Madonna in a statement.
So could this be Madonna’s planned collab with Cardi B and Kim Kardashian? Will Cardi B compose the soundtrack, while Kim signs on as Corpse #2 — truly the role she was born to play?
And most importantly, is Madonna also going to appear in this movie, or are we due for another Schlepped Away?
Fans may recall that Madonna’s acting career has given her a luminous reputation and a plethora of awards — at the Razzies. (She’s the most awarded actress in Razzie history.) However, her directing career hasn’t fared much better: Her first film, Filth and Wisdom, was described by one critic as “a terrible, terrible worthless movie that you shouldn’t give any time to.” And her most recent film, W.E., was described by many as “a movie.”
On the bright side, DePrince has a genuinely interesting and inspiring life, so maybe Madonna hopefully won’t totally madge this up. After DePrince’s parents were killed in Sierra Leone’s civil war in the 1990s, she was adopted by a family in New Jersey, where she excelled in ballet before becoming a soloist with the Dutch National Ballet.
We honestly wish Madonna the best. Maybe two years from now she will have scored a directing Oscar and we will (kinda) hate ourselves for this semi-snarky post.