Trump Announces New Kennedy Center Honors Recipients

Comedy, Featured  

In a stunning reversal of an earlier reversal, President Donald Trump and First Lady Melania Trump have decided they WILL attend the Kennedy Center Honors this December, but they’ve scrapped the initial honorees, in favor of new ones more supportive of the current Administration.

The Trumps had issued a statement early Saturday saying they would not participate in this year’s ceremony, “to allow the honorees to celebrate without any political distraction.”

Two of the original honorees, legendary TV producer Norman Lear and dancer/choreographer Carmen de Lavallade, had already made it known they would be boycotting the event in protest over Trump’s divisive leadership, racial insensitivity and planned cuts to the National Endowment for the Arts.  

New honorees to include gun nut/rocker Ted Nugent, abstinence advocate, grandmother of two out-of-wedlock little ones Sarah Palin, former KKK Grand Wizard and plastic surgery junkie David Duke, TVs “Chachi,” Scott Baio, Fox News pundit, Clueless star Stacey Dash, clueless gay porn star Colby Keller, Philippines President Rodrigo Duterte and the corpse of women’s rights opponent Phyllis Schlafly.

In previous years, star-studded gala has been hosted by Walter Cronkite, Caroline Kennedy and Glenn Close, among others. This year, Triumph the Insult Comic Dog will do the honors.

The White House staff has promised a scrumptious post-awards banquet catered by right-wing cause supporters Papa Johns and Chick-fil-A.

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