Of dicks and dictators.
Donald Trump has officially turned the White House into an entertainment vehicle. In celebration of his historical, ineffective, and purely-for-attention meeting with Kim Jong Un yesterday, Trump created a teaser trailer promoting a “movie” starring himself and Kim as heroes who will save the world.
No, this is not an SNL parody or an ironic supercut on YouTube. This is our lives.
According to the trailer, which Trump probably “made” by ordering it from his aides and then watching Fox & Friends for eight hours, Trump’s meeting with Kim was “a new story … a new beginning … one of peace, two men, two leaders, one destiny. A story about a special moment in time, when a man is presented with one chance that may never be repeated. What will [Kim] choose? To show vision and leadership? Or not?”
Well, we all know that Trump has chosen the “not” option, so this is definitely about Kim.
The trailer also spends a lot of time jumping between inspirational images such as sunrises, basketball players shooting hoops, Kim Jong Un shaking someone’s hand against all odds, and a bunch of clouds. We wouldn’t be surprised if the shot of Kim’s handshake required fifty takes to get him looking exactly like Lea DeLaria.
There’s even a dramatic voiceover, which, as IndieWire points out, is too reminiscent of the ‘90s for this trailer to carry any serious weight. (Also, as many have pointed out, history cannot “evolve.” It can only happen. The only person who would accuse history of “evolving” is the type of person who would lie about the past in attempt to change it. Such as when his inauguration ceremony numbers are embarrassingly low.)
The trailer also runs at 4 minutes and 12 seconds, which is way too long for a movie teaser trailer. But you’ll probably get the point after the first ten soaring shots of clouds or stallions galloping in the surf. Or the “Italian Stallion” himself, Sylvester Stallone shaking hands with The Donald.