trumpnationalanthem

Trump’s New National Anthem Lyrics Revealed

Featured, Politics  

Despite years of insisting that he’s the most patriotic man on this planet, Donald Trump has still not learned the words to “God Bless America.” At his non-traditional, hastily organized “Celebration of America” event Tuesday, he fumbled over the words as he tried to sing along with a men’s chorus rendition of the age-old tune….

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kimtrump

Kardashian, Trump White House Reality TV Star Summit Yields Zero Results

Politics  

Earlier this week, the Oval Office became the site of a Mensa meeting in which some of the world’s biggest problems were swiftly and definitively solved forever. J/k, it was a meeting between Kim Kardashian and Donald Trump. KK and DT have a lot in common: They’re both reality stars, they’re both attention-seeking narcissists, and…

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trumpmemorial

Draft Dodger Prez Memorial Day Message Praises Self, Twitter Claps Back

Featured, Politics  

You may be a fascist if you spend half of your day gaslighting your allies and constituents on social media. But you’re only a true fascist if you start gaslighting the dead ones, too. Today, Donald Trump celebrated Memorial Day by tweeting that “those who died for our great country would be very happy and…

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trumpstahl

Trump To Journalist Stahl: Attacks On The Press Attempt To ‘Discredit You All’

Politics  

Attn: We’ve gone full Nineteen Eighty-Forty-Five. According to CBS News journalist Lesley Stahl, Donald Trump once admitted to attacking the press in order to purposely discredit them.   Reportedly, when Stahl asked Trump prior to the 2016 election why he criticized the press so aggressively, Trump responded, “You know why I do it? I do…

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comeybook

James Comey Pours The Tea, Trump Administration ‘Mob Family’

Politics  

With his sad eyes, frowny stare, and salt n’ pepper seriousness, James Comey isn’t the kind of guy you’d expect to sit down for a kiki. But alas, he was the life of the kiki last night when he sat down with George Stephanopoulos for a shadefest of historical proportions on “20/20.” In addition to…

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devosdrseuss

Dr Seuss Villain DeVos Won’t Investigate Trans Discrimination Complaints

Featured, Politics  

With her pinched nose and large, probing raccoon eyes, Betsy DeVos is looking more and more like a Dr. Seuss character every day. And considering her Education Department just announced it will ignore complaints filed by transgender students who are banned from restrooms matching their gender identity, let’s just go ahead and say that character…

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